On our way home this morning from cycling class, my roommate and I were discussing what we want in life. I know. Deep conversation for 11am on a Saturday morning, especially after having biked sixteen miles and barely having any coffee in our system. It was a good conversation, though, and is one that young adults our age should have. We’re 24 and 26, in case you’re curious. If you want to know our birthdays so you can send gifts/wire us money/pay for our Eurotrip, I’ll PM you. Xoxo thanks.
We were discussing what we want right now. At this moment. Mind you, we are women and, at the time, had low blood sugar, so our answers sounded a bit like:
“What I want right now is to be sitting on my porch in North Carolina wearing plaid while my bearded babe-husband brings me coffee and we sit on the porch together and talk and laugh and also it’s probably a little chilly and it’d be nice to be staring at some deer.”
Go ‘head. Laugh away. But 1) it isn’t far fetched and 2) it sounds nice, doesn’t it?
Brittany then exclaimed, “Let’s move! Let’s go to grad school and live together in the Carolinas!” To which I replied, “OKAY!… but wait I have work on Monday.”
That simple statement got me thinking, and you all know what happens when I get to thinking…
You want to do this but you have that. So what?
You want to travel here but it’s too expensive. So what?
You want to live somewhere else because you know that your hometown will always be here but you’re afraid to do so because it’s change and change is scary. SO WHAT?
MY GOODNESS, I AM SICK OF BEING SCARED SOMETIMES.
Did you guys know that I used to not want to go anywhere alone because I was afraid people would be like, “Why’s this girl alone?”
Now I beg and plead to do things alone because 1) silence and 2) because I’m a grown-ass woman and I’m around people all the live long day and it’s nice to just do something by your damn self and answer to only you and treat yourself to not one, but two iced coffees in one day without someone judging you for doing so.
I want to travel alone. That’s something I’ve always wanted to do. Does it scare me? Yes. Am I afraid of loneliness? Sure. But one thing I know for sure is that if you want to do something for yourself, only you can make that happen. You can’t sit around and wait for that one friend to be like, “Okay! I’m ready to go to Greece with you now!” Because your response will probably be, “Dammit, Georgina. We’re 88 and I have a double knee replacement scheduled tomorrow morning at 5am.”
A.K.A. STOP WAITING ON OTHERS TO LIVE YOUR LIFE FOR YOU WHEN YOU COULD BE OUT THERE, OH, IDK, LIVING YOUR LIFE FOR YOURSELF.
I love typing in caps. It really seems to get my point across. If it’s stressing you out, I’M SORRY. FEEL FREE TO LEAVE AND SWING BY TOMORROW. WHY? BECAUSE YOU CAN DO YOU, BOO BOO. IT’S YOUR LIFE.
Why am I screaming all of this? Most likely because I want to ensure that I am actually hearing it. I’m notorious for giving advice, really good advice, but missing the message entirely when it comes to applying it to my life.
There are so many things that I want to do with my life and so many places that I want to travel and see and even live.
One of them would be North Carolina. I’ve driven through it on my way to New York (another place I must visit again soon), and it’s beautiful. It’s so beautiful, I want to throw up because I’ve been missing out for so long. New England. That’s another place I must see. The midwest seems super. I bet Seattle is awesome. Know what’s been calling my name for years? Ireland. I’d like to visit Germany again, since the only time I’ve been was for two layovers on my way to and from Prague. I want to go back there too because the beer is A+ and the views are A++ gold star smiley face. Finding myself tucked away inside of a winery in Vienna again wouldn’t be so bad either. Japan would be swell. I’ve heard New Zealand is pretty damn great. Greece, because have you seen how blue the water is?
I want to travel for pleasure.
I want to travel for service.
I want to travel for me.
I want to get married and be a mom one day, but I don’t think I would want to raise my family in New Orleans, which means I would move. Am I okay with that? Absolutely. Because New Orleans will always be here. But I won’t be.
That’s the thing. I won’t be.
One of my biggest fears is living a life of regret. Living a life unfulfilled. How devastating would that be to wake up one day and think to yourself, “I should have done more.” It would kill me.
So do everything. See everything. Go everywhere. Go where the wind takes you. Hop on a train and figure it out. Save up your dollars and buy a one way ticket to that one country you’ve been wanting to visit and go there and live and love it.
Write your story.
Add chapters to your book of life.
Fall in love with the world, but most importantly, fall in love with yourself.
Love you. Be okay with you. Take yourself on a date to France. Or Spain. Or that little bed and breakfast in Connecticut that you stumbled upon during one of your Pinterest binges where you kept saying, “Ugh, I want to go there.”
So go there.
Do what you want.
It’s your damn life. Do what you want.